nibblezz: (Default)
Not only did I import all my posts from [livejournal.com profile] renewed2, which is my current lj, I've also decided to import posts from my earlier livejournal. Reading through all of my entries made me sad and brought back so many bad memories.

My life has changed since the journal's creation in 2007, but I feel I haven't progressed enough. I'm still living in the same place, still dealing with similar issues, still this and still that. When will my circumstance truly change? I'm truly tired of living in this shit hole shared with an enabling dope and a fuckin shit-head. Living here wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for those two. 

I hate it that I sacrificed so much time and money going to school. Yes, I finally completed school and earned a BFA, but it was done at a huge cost to me and my sanity. 

Looking back at my life, I wish I had someone looking after me and my best interests instead of their own selfish agendas. 

I suppose I shouldn't look back, can't change anything. I'm trying to look forward, but it's difficult. 
nibblezz: (Cute)
The semester is OVER!!! I'm so relieved! I turned in my final painting on Friday. After coming home I slept and then I slept some more. After only getting 2 to 3 hours of sleep a day for the past week trying to finish my last assignment I'm beyond exhausted. Friday was officially the end of the semester, which also means I'm unofficially done with school. I have to wait and see if I passed my art history class to offcially celebrate, but I think I did.
...

Next goal: find FULL-TIME employment and move the fuck out. My family are Cheeto supporters. I thought I could over look that, but coupled with all their other bullshit I say FUCK them. I have lost what little respect that I might have had for them. That goes for any Cheeto supporter. The hell with respecting differences. If you can condone the crap that the Cheeto monster has done and continue to do then FUCK you too. I don't need people like that in my life. Looks like I'm going to need new friends. Good riddance.
nibblezz: (Cute)
I'm sitting in class right now and I'm hating every minute of it. Half the time I sleep in it and the other half I just loathe listening to the instructor. Oh and I can't stand some of the students. Bunch of no talent hacks pretending to be important.

Two more weeks to go.

TWO MORE WEEKS!!!

*history really isn't stupid, I just hate the class and instructor.

Tired

Nov. 14th, 2016 05:41 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
The student show opening was on Sunday. Such a waste of time and gas. The guests included friends, family and faculty. So I drove 100 miles round trip to take a few pictures, drink lemon water, and say "Hi" to a few people. 30 minutes later I left.

LOL

Our senior student exhibition will end this Thursday. Why can't our work be up for at least two weeks? We put so much time, effort and money into framing and matting.

Sigh. Whatever. I'm just glad the stress is over.
...

I'm so tired. Did another all-nighter. This time it was to finish a paper. My paper doesn't even make sense lol. Oh well.

Done

Nov. 12th, 2016 09:44 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
Hanging my stuff took longer than anticipated. I'm so sore from standing, bending, reaching and walking back and forth. I'm just glad the hard part is over. Tomorrow we just show up, look at each other's work and eat. I can handle that.
...

I was talking with a friend about Cheeto Man. We agreed it's not worth inviting health issues due to extreme anger and hatred. I'm taking a break from all news and social media items that feature Cheeto Man. For my own well being I'm just going to relax and chill. There is a reason this happened, while I don't understand it right now perhaps someday I will. I still want to live on another planet. The new America is frightening (or is it the same America, but we no longer have rose colored glasses on?).
nibblezz: (Cute)
Framing and matting is hard. I have to frame my stuff for the student show. I'm done with six out of seven. The only reason why I'm not done is because I accidentally bent one of my mats. So now I have to recut a 16"x20" mat.

UGH!!

At least I have extra mat board to cut. It does help that I have a mat cutter.
...

I learned Staples' print center is awesome! My prints look awesome! And they were only like $1.19 to print on cardstock.
...

I'm trying to avoid watching the news. I do not want to see that Cheeto shit stain smiling and celebrating amongst his people (by people I mean the morons who voted for him). Man, when did I become so bitter and angry? I really REALLY wished moving to Mars was an option.

It's very apparent that we are a deeply divided nation. Some conservatives claim they "endured" Obama for 8 years and we should do the same. BULLSHIT! They have done EVERYTHING they possibly could to undermine his presidency. FUCK those backward assholes. Guess what fuckers Cheeto shit stain will NEVER be my president. See how I get just thinking about him?

Many are teeming with anger...and it's not going away. I see a fracture coming and it's not going to be pretty.
nibblezz: (Cute)
I pulled an all-nighter for nothing. I got up took a shower and felt awful. Didn't feel like making the 100 mile round trip to school. At 35 I'm noticing a slow down. I can't do the all-nighters anymore, those days are gone.

Anyways, since I'm home I'll catch-up on things I've been neglecting.

So today is Halloween. Eh. Don't observe it. Tomorrow there's going to be lots of post-halloween candy sales. I'll be on the look-out for the Jolly Ranchers.

When did Twitter become home to the far-right nutters? As a moderate I can't stand neither side. 
nibblezz: (Cute)
Been tried...exhausted really so this post will be short.

  • Been super stressed, but what else is new.

  • Bought Cheesecake a cat toy. As expected he hates it.

  • Had a hormonal freak out. Damn. Why do I still have my period? After my right ovary was removed I was hoping the other would just fail. No such luck.

  • Super hungry. Like I want to eat cake all day LOL.

  • Having the blahs.

  • Skipped school Monday and slept in.

nibblezz: (Cute)
Working, school and freelancing is exhausting. I almost told my client to take a hike. I was within minutes of telling him I couldn't work with him anymore. One, because I was extremely exhausted. Two, I was annoyed by the lack of design direction from him. Almost on que we skyped and the discussion helped steer me off the ledge. It felt a lot like God was telling me 'It's ok, I'll help you get through it'. And he did.

School doesn't end for another three months. It doesn't sound like a long time, but juggling all three plus the senior art show is overwhelming. Why did I even agree to the project? Again, like on que it was an opportunity to meet a need. I'm short on my tution and needed almost the extact amount I would be receiving from the freelance gig. Again, God met my need. It hasn't been easy, not by a long shot, but God is with me, so that is somewhat comforting.
...

Finally got a Surface Pro 4. Good timing too. My brick of a laptop is on it's last legs and my tabletPC is not only slow but also experiencing some worrisome problems. Hopefully I can prepare them for sale and get rid of them soon. My SP4 maybe much smaller than my 17.3" brick, but it performs much better and the screen is far superior. Where was this awesome tablet four years ago?

Grumpy

Aug. 18th, 2016 03:50 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
Haven't been in the mood to write, or much of anything else lately.

Former client contacted me out of the blue yesterday wanting to "catch-up." I'm using the time before our skype meeting to update my livejournal lol. In about 20 minutes I should know what half-baked idea/project he wants me to mock-up for him. Probably some stupid wannbe hipster app that only appeals to millennials. Yeah whatever, as long as he pays me it's all good.
...

Still miserable and hot.
Still living with a drama queen and her enabler.
Still have the same problems I did months ago.
...

I start the new and hopefully my LAST semester next week. It's already off to a craptastic start. These state universities are not made for us non-traditional students. They inconviently schedule these bullshit meet-ups right in the middle of the day. Even worse some of these classes are scheduled for the morning or mid day. Yes, because all of us are 18 year olds who have no jobs or financial responsibilities. 

Sucky Week

Jun. 12th, 2016 03:23 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
Overall this week has sucked for many reasons. I'm not in the typing mood. Here are bullet points, since I'm not up to typing/writing:

  • We have a lot of angry and unhinged people in this world and unfortuately innocent people usually end up paying the price. Almost every week we hear of shootings, terrorist attacks, and other equally awful stuff. No matter where in the world, there is always someone with an axe to grind against someone and/or something. Sadly it's only going to get worse.

  • I can see why there is so much turn-over at my job. Trying to get everyone on the same page is like pulling your fingernails off with a plier. Everyone is only looking out for themsevles. It's a miracle that anything gets done. Ugh...why can't I ever find a decent job? Maybe I need to create my own?

  • Some people drive like assholes. Excuse my language but I'm just not happy about it. It's going to be three times in the last few weeks that an impatient driver has snuck behind me going way too fast while I'm changing lanes. The scariest was on the freeway and the jerk almost clipped me weaving in-and-out of traffic.

  • I'm tired, but at least I finally finished the portrait I was working on. Originally I created it for a digital skin coloring demo.

  • Peaches has perched himself on my tablet. Very cute :)

nibblezz: (Cute)
Last night I had a brief, but very annoying internet outage. It was torture. How did I ever function without internet? At least the outage helped me to get off my tablet/computer/phone and do some cardio LOL.

Unrelated, but I decided to take a day off from school and just work from home. I didn't feel like trekking 50 miles to attend one class and skip the other to just do what I can do from home.

Another factor that helped me to stay home was Cheesecake. Yesterday he freaked out, took-off and hurt his wing. He's ok, but I just wanted to make sure someone I trust (me) was able to watch him. Peaches seems to like having his space back while Cheesecake hangs out with me. Those two will most likely never be friends. 

I'm Alive

Apr. 19th, 2016 12:30 am
nibblezz: (Cute)
So it's April now. So much stuff...

The Good

  • I FINALLY got hired and it's local! No more awful soul crushing morning commutes.

  • There is three more weeks until the semester is over. I hate school.

  • I love my new wardobe.

  • Free to exhale. Finished taxes on Sunday and it looks like I'm getting a small refund. Tax software from best to least: Turbo Tax > TaxAct > H&R Block. This will be my first and last time I use H&R Block. There was a reason Amazon had a price cut. Never again.

  • Discovered the Prism app. Got all my bills paid and sorted out.

  • I have hope again, that my situation will get better.

  • Hooked on The Catch.

  • I lost weight :)

  • Been more physically active, which led to the weight loss.


The Bad

  • Burnt-out. I can't bring myself to start on my project or draw...or design. Which is an awful thing considering my job is designing LOL.

  • I discovered I hate risographs.

  • Got bad news about my cousin. Stage 4 metastatic breast cancer. It's not looking good for her :( If anyone happens to read this please pray for her. If Jesus can bring Lazarus back from the dead there is still hope for her.

  • The used copy of Adobe CS5 didn't pan out. The seller is a lying sack of poo. Good thing I bought it off of Amazon and was able to get my monies back. But this leaves me without software. CC? Yuck. I guess at this point I have no choice. I just wish Affinity would hurry up and release the beta for Windows already.

  • Had a mini spiritual meltdown and axed bible study. In my defense my bible study partner had very little life expereince in well...everything lol. I'm sure once she goes through more gut wrenching trials she'll grow some empathy until then...BYE! LOL

Tired

Feb. 26th, 2016 09:09 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
I wasted the entire day in bed and I don't feel bad about it. This week has been challenging and physically exhausting. I just really hate school. I'm struggling to design stuff, because I don't want too. Having said that, maybe it's a good thing that I was no longer in the running for the job. I was pretty bummed that I wasn't even called back to complete a design test. Oh well, everything happens for a reason.
...

To console myself I decided to binge watch all three seasons of Dallas. The first season was absolutely dreadful, but the show really picked up the pace in the second and final season. I never really noticed Mitch Pileggi in the X-Files, but the man can really act. Besides the initial "oh hey that's AD Walter Skinner from the X-Files" his overall performace was so good I primarily associate him with his Harris Ryland character now.

To-Do List

Feb. 18th, 2016 06:37 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
I have about 30 minutes to kill until my next class. I'm so behind in life. I still have to activate my new credit card, reload the printer with new ink, change my primary doctor, throw away the boxes, renew my auto insurance and I'm sure I'm missing something else.
...

My interview was yesterday. If I get it, it will show me that it's all God, because I royally screwed up some of the questions LOL. At least I looked very stylish :) I was early and found nearby parking. The interviewers were very late and at the last minute changed floors were the interview took place.
...

Been binge watching the X-Files. I'm up to season 9. One thing that I didn't appreciate when the show first ran was AD Skinner. That guy was very underrated. He was so attractive. Not sure why the writers didn't give him a bigger role, especially when David Duchovny left the series. Adding two new agents was a mistake.

The new episodes are okay, but I feel the writing is to applease the long-time fans. It's so campy and mediocore. It doesn't hold a candle to the original (1-5 seasons). Anyways AD Skinner (Mitch Pileggi) still looks good except for that awful beard. CUT IT OFF!!! It makes him look like Santa Claus.  

EEeeeeeeeee

Feb. 3rd, 2016 04:46 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
What a week this has been. I'm now a few weeks into this semester and I have to say...I look forward to my very last day of school. I've mentally and physically clocked out. My sequential imaging class is nothing like I thought it was going to be. Basically it sucks. On a better note my production class is better than it was the last time I took and dropped it LOL.
...

I had a heart-to-heart with God about my situation and how I felt about it. When I woke up I felt different, almost like a new person. I've grown pretty angry and fustrated about my situation and blamed it on God. After a rather long and angry prayer session I went to sleep to awaken unburdened, no longer angry or bitter. To say I feel better is an understatement.
...

After my prayer session I got an email notification about a job that I applied to last month. I've scheduled the interview for Febraury 17th :). FINALLY!!! I don't think it was a coincidence. He definately deserves praise for this :)
...

In addition to getting new eyeglasses I went shoe shopping. No, I didn't get gazilion new designer pumps that I don't need. I got super cheap shoes that were on sale and/or clearance. Basically the shoes I have now are ready for the landfill. I also had to get very expensive refills for my Copic markers.

Over

Dec. 17th, 2015 11:14 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
Yay! School is finally OVER!!! I survived!! Originally I was going to attempt to finish all my studio classes next semester, but I'm glad I came to my senses. My last semester will be next fall. I hate to think I have one more year left, but hopefully it'll go by quickly.

Seasonal job hunt has hit a wall. I would have been working for Amazon right now, except I couldn't get in on the training due to school. UPS was the same.

*Sigh*

Sigh

Sep. 2nd, 2015 08:34 pm
nibblezz: (Cute)
Lots of eBay, PayPal, school, Amazon and hospital bill shenanigans.

EBay seller cancelled the transaction and refunded my monies. Great. Now I have no software. Back to the drawing board. Maybe God's looking out for me. Perhaps the serial was no good?

Dropped my last class. Coming back from surgery to a full time schedule was just a bit too much.

Amazon seller refunded my transaction. Why list a product if you're not 100% sure if it's compatible with the listed model number? Bleh.

I feel my hospital bill is wrong. I don't see my co-pay payment being applied to the final bill. The difference can be $374 if I'm right.
nibblezz: (Cute)
Why no online classes? What is this 1990? CSULB's art department needs a total re-haul starting from the top.
nibblezz: (Cute)
*Sigh*

Is the semester over yet? Just checking.

Just one more semester...just one more semester...just one more semester...

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